Attendance was about 40, almost all of them from either Trail or Rossland. We were thrilled that James and Hugh Pelmore left Vancouver for the drive in the early morning and made it to the service with time to spare. It helped a lot having a big 4-wheel-drive with new snow tires.
Below are scans of the programs for the service. Also, text from my talk. Eve also spoke to the gathering, as well as her husband Bill. There were lots of songs and music, which Dee would have enjoyed.
" Everyone knows how friendly and considerate Dee Dee was and how loyal and supportive she was to her family, friends and neighbors. There was certainly a lot that was special about Dee Dee. I suspect everyone here has their own memories of Dee-isms and stories of memorable encounters with her.
In retrospect, she was selfless and modest to a fault. It could be difficult to entertain her because if there was something enjoyable she would say I wish Gran were here, or I wish Dally were here, or Leigh or Peter or Ken. And if there was a good program on TV she would rush to phone anyone and everyone she knew to tell them about it. I remember about 4 years ago getting the DVD Blades of Glory for her to watch, which was a farce starring Will Ferrell and Jon Hader about two men as a figure skating pair. Soon after the movie started she rushed to the kitchen telephone to let the Jewitts know that figure skating was on TV.
For her, the joy was not in the event itself but in the sharing and connecting with people.
She was a woman of hidden talents. As a boy I was always impressed by the wonderful drawings of models and profiles that she did on used envelopes while she was talking on the phone. It was a talent she kept to herself. Like her mother Helen, she did not want to draw attention to herself. I was always amazed she could draw so well, and no one seemed to know about it. She also had an outstanding soprano singing voice, but, unlike her mother, she did not play piano or sing in public, at least not until her last years when she remembered old-time songs but not much else. She became famous around Columbia View Lodge for her singing, particularly “Oh, how I hate to get up in the morning” as she was being rousted from bed for an early morning breakfast.
On behalf of Dee Dee, I would like to thank everyone she encountered in recent years for their patience and understanding. Some people think that once someone has Alzheimers their life is effectively over, that a glass that is not quite full is tainted. But Dee Dee’s very slow progression over 12 or 13 years was proof that, with lots of help from family, friends and the community, the person can still have a meaningful and enjoyable life. Somehow, she was able to maintain her dignity and self-respect to the very end, largely through denial, but also through will power and inner strength. Privacy and dignity were very important to her. She had a phobia about being alone in the house overnight, so my late brother Ken had a key role in enabling her to stay at home for several years before he died in 2005.
One of her ways of coping with the loss of memory was to be as nice to people as she could possibly be. She was indeed Queen of the Compliments. I know she told some people they were beautiful who had probably not heard that word associated with them for many, many years. When it was really impossible to compliment people on their appearance, she would instead lavish praise on their clothes.
She did as much as she could with the strength and brain power she had. Even on her last day of life, exactly a week ago, she was still able to gently kiss Eve and I.
She never stopped surprising me and entertaining me. I am so thankful to have had her as a mother and a friend."
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